Keep Your Window of Resilience Wide Open...So That You Can Achieve Optimal Energy & Peace!

  • Jan 13, 2021 08:07 PM Central
  • tobi b feldman
  • 1 Comment
Keep Your Window of Resilience Wide Open...So That You Can Achieve Optimal Energy & Peace!
AHA moment!  Right there on the floor, sitting in a circle with my loving meditation group.  On a large piece of paper on the floor was a rudimentary drawing of Dan Siegel's Window of Tolerance.  I remember leaving that afternoon with a clarity I hadn't had in years! 

Visualize the window.  Seriously, close your eyes and picture a window that can open from the bottom or the top. 

I see this window as my window of resilience and it is part of the equation of how I became resilientAF in spite of some of the greatest most heartbreaking challenges.  

Check out this video explaining about the window and how I keep mine open! 

 Then join me in the resilientAF midlife mamas group on Facebook! 






Mental Health Over Academics...Understanding Why

  • Jan 7, 2021 02:40 PM Central
  • tobi b feldman
  • 2 Comments
I'm going to let the video do it's thing this week...so grab a cup of something yummy and hit play.  Then share it with someone else 💜





5 Tips for Staying Grounded During Crisis

  • May 5, 2020 03:24 PM Central
  • tobi b feldman
  • 2 Comments




I have had my fair share of experience with trauma and crisis through the years and there are several tools I have used to support me.
 
These are things you can implement for a crisis or feel overwhelmed. 


Check out the special recipe at the end!  It's one of my faves!


 

1. Make Lists


I love making lists about all sorts of things, it keeps me focused and organized...though when I'm in times of crisis I stall out and don't lean on making lists for anything!  Part of the mental shut down.  


So, when in crisis or overwhelm I make lists of things I can manage, the things I can have some control over...it makes me feel better to see it on paper and know I can DO SOMETHING. It may not be related to the crisis situation, but it is indicative of life moving forward.  


I also make lists of the things that I can't "control", that are causing me pain, stress, fear, or whatever emotion I am feeling. It's cathartic to dump the thoughts out of my head.  Sometimes I will rip up the page, toss it in the shredder or the wood stove! 

 

2. Evaluate 


I check in with myself and ask pertinent questions.  


I evaluate how I am handling the situation at hand, if I am doing all the things that I am able to that may affect change and is anything working.  


I weigh the pros and cons and assess the benefit to risk ratios. 


 

3. Choose What to Focus On 


I make a conscious choice to focus on the positive aspects.  To give energy to that which I can control and I make another list!  

I list all the ways I can show up and all the things I CAN do. 

I believe in the Law of Attraction and focusing on what I want to flow into my life. 


 

4. Breathe Deep and Move Gingerly


When things are overwhelming I take one step at a time.  I break the day down minute to minute, hour to hour, day to day...chunks of manageable time. 

I cut myself slack and let some of the less critical tasks sit on the list. 


5.  Healthy Coping Tools


Supporting emotional wellness during times of crisis is essential.  The myriad of activities that resonate with you belong on a master list that you memorize (or have in your phone!) 

Listening to music, taking walks, CrossFit, talking to friends, taking baths, using essential oils, are just a few on my list! 

Essential oils are an excellent way to cope with emotions.  Many of the oils have grounding qualities....there is even a blend of oils that carry that name!


 

DIY Grounding Diffuser Blend


The three oils in this blend are incredibly grounding so they are quite magical together! 

 

  • 3 drops Northern Lights Black Spruce

  • 3 drops Frankincense 

  • 3 drops Lavender

What are some of the ways you cope with crisis and/or overwhelm? I am always looking for fresh ideas! 

 

 Looking to kick start your self care? Join me at 90 days to a more vibrant you!